What does it mean to be yourself? Sometimes it looks like such an easy question, but if you think about it, it might appear more difficult than you thought. The question becomes “Who am I?”, and it could be extremely hard to find an answer, as every human being on earth has many characteristics that might also change with the situation or the people we are with. Furthermore, nowadays, living in a society that tends to make us all the same, that divides us into categories and tells us how we are supposed to be, to look and to behave, it’s becoming harder and harder to be our true selves.
All this pressure can lead us to feel empty, and we could find ourselves looking at our lives as if we are just watching them from the outside, as it could become more important to appear than to be.
I think that everyone in their life has been told something like “you should not behave like that”, or “this is not appropriate”… this happens because society tends to tell us what we have to be. And it’s not easy to ignore the pressure of society when people judge you, or point at you, or talk about the choices you have made.
Every human being on this planet is different, but too many times we try to be like somebody else, we try to change not only our appearance but also our nature in order to be appreciated, and that’s so dangerous because we might lose ourselves. And here it becomes even harder to tell who we are.
The psychiatrist Carl Gustav Jung said that “life is a journey from me to myself”, this means that everybody needs to go deeper into the dimension of being. This is what we need to give a sense to our lives and to make them complete. Finding the “self” and expressing it is our major challenge. But how can we do this?
Finding ourselves is not something that we can do in a day: it’s a journey and it needs constant work. The most important thing is to listen to ourselves and to get to know our souls, our deepest desires and ambitions. There are many ways to do this, like writing a diary, talking to a friend, a family member or a psychologist, or meditating. What is most important is to be conscious of ourselves.
But there’s also another step to make: it’s not enough to find ourselves but everybody also needs to be and to feel themselves. The equilibrate self-expression has three features:
- spontaneity. It’s the freedom to be and to do what we feel like being and doing.
- integrity. It’s an external manifestation of the totality of our soul.
- originality, that for me it’s the most important. It’s accepting our own unique features and letting our soul lead us.
It’s also important to find the right place between the “wild side”, the irrational part of ourselves and the “oppressive side”, which tends to limit us.
It’s not easy and we will find multiple obstacles, like fear of failure and not being enough, but especially today it’s important to be ourselves, to find our own place in the world. It’s only with our own, unique features that we can do something great.
I think that nobody should limit themselves: just be who you are and live your own life, make your own choices. People do always judge, so let them judge you for what you truly are and not for something else.
Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”